Dancing in the Dark
by tromana
Summary: One night, one party. Eight different experiences. Updated: Nick: Some people would say his life has changed into a train wreck.
1. Mini

**Title: **Dancing in the Dark  
><strong>Author: <strong>tromana  
><strong>Rating: <strong>T  
><strong>Characters: <strong>All of Gen 3.  
><strong>Summary: <strong>One night, one party. Eight different experiences.**  
><strong>**Notes: **First lengthier piece for Skins. Be gentle with me...

**Dancing in the Dark**

**Part One - Mini**

She downs the vodka shot with practised ease and smiles brightly.

Mini McGuinness is young, free and single. What isn't there to celebrate? She has the rest of her life in front of her. The most she can do right here, right now is to make sure that she has the time of her life. After all, she isn't going to be young forever. Sooner or later, she's going to have to grow up. Hold down a job, pay bills, have actual responsibilities.

And then, then it'll all end.

For some, it comes sooner or later. She only has to have a look at her mum for that.

Shelley McGuinness sacrificed her life to have a kid too young, too soon. She didn't even manage to stay in contact with her father. Mini is proud of her mum; she managed to raise her single-handedly, but sometimes…

She shakes her head decisively. Now isn't the time to think of that. To dwell on what could have beens, what _should_ have beens. Everyone else is having fun and therefore, why shouldn't she?

Mini trembles slightly as she lifts the cigarette to her mouth. Trying to light it is worse; her hand won't stop shaking. It takes more attempts than she'd care to admit before the lighter even sparks a little. And as soon as a flame shines brightly, it's extinguished once more. So, she tries again and again, to no avail.

Eventually, she simply gives up. Angrily, she throws the cigarette to the ground and stamps on it. It's a waste, but right now, she doesn't care.

This isn't her, it never has been.

People look at her and have so many expectations. She's slim, blonde and drop dead gorgeous. Of course there's going to be some preconceptions, just as there would be if she wore glasses and let her eyebrows grow out instead. When presented with something, everyone automatically think of the stereotypes. They forget there's more to people than just that.

She isn't happy.

She hasn't been for a long while.

A lot of what she does is for control. So much is intangible, reliant on other people, on fate or luck. She can maintain her weight through exercise and food, however. And she can choose how she dresses, who she hangs out with, what she smokes and so on. She can control how people see her and somewhat more importantly, how she views herself.

But can she go back in time and find her father? Stop him from leaving? Of course not. It feels like a lifetime ago now, but can she stop Liv from fucking her last boyfriend? No. Nor is she capable of stopping strangers from murdering each other, idiots from driving under the influence, stealing and doing all manner of unsavoury things. She's just as incapable of stopping the world from turning or the sun from burning.

And she hates feeling so out of control. Like a cog in a great machine, an insignificant part that doesn't really do anything. Mini wants to change the world, but of course, that's never going to happen. She's just one person. If, for any bizarre reason, she does end up with any modicum of influence, it's highly unlikely that it'll be enduring enough for her to make a real difference. As far as she's concerned, she's simply not clever enough for that. Not like Grace and Franky.

Her mum has had an influence on her as well. For as long as Mini can remember, she has boasted about how her daughter was just like a, well, mini version of her. Taught her how to tease the boys, make herself look beautiful. Drilled into her the importance of good fitness, hygiene and grooming. Told her that being street smart was as important as proving herself academically.

Repeated the mantra of 'men are only interested in one thing'.

The one thing she gave up all too easily.

At the time, it seemed like a great idea. Fuck you once and you'll never have it again. Then, he'll be gagging for more. Begging for forgiveness that she would be reluctant to give. Nick would prove himself to be worthy of her love after unexpected declarations of adoration. He'd be lost without her, need her by his side. They would be the power-couple of Roundview once more, just as they had been months ago. Like Cheryl and Ashley Cole, only with a happy ending.

Ultimately, it had been all wrong.

Nick has fallen off the rails, but that has as much to do with Matty and their father as it did to do with her. Instead of showering her with roses (that would soon die) and chocolates (that she wouldn't eat), he has found comfort in the bottom of a vodka bottle. Much as she is now.

Just because her mother fell from one relationship into another, it doesn't mean she has to as well.

Contrary to her mother's belief, she isn't entirely her mother's daughter.

She wants to love and be loved. Something deep, enduring. Like her friendship with Franky, in a way. It has to _mean _something. Mini doesn't want to be the easy fuck, just because she looks like the type. She wants the romantic picnics at the beach, the whispered sweet nothings, somebody to watch her fly and catch her when she falls.

Most of all, she just doesn't want to make do, like her mother has done for all of these years.

As far as she's concerned, she and Nick could have been everything she's ever dreamed of. Before he got too impatient and shagged Liv. Before he broke her heart (and dreams) into a thousand tiny pieces.

Before he stole her virginity, as if it meant nothing.

She watches as he dances with Liv and Matty, unbeknownst that his every move is being scrutinised. It's the first time he's looked happy for months and genuinely, she's pleased for him. He fell a long way, after he retired from the rugby team.

But he's still not the same Nick. Not the one she had loved. He's broken, flawed. Even the most careful restorer cannot cover his tracks. The damage has still been done.

Besides, she'll always remember what he's done to her, too. She's not exactly undamaged from this fiasco either.

However, it is a learning curve. She knows that there's certain things in life that are precious. She can't take certain things back, however much she wishes she could. People _will _betray her, especially if she remains blind to their faults. Even her best friends can turn and stab her in the back, without a moment's notice. You have to be harsh to live in this world. Nothing is ever easy, not even if you're the most beautiful girl in the world.

Mini also knows she won't hand herself on a plate to the next man who takes an attraction to her. Just because she's no longer a virgin, it doesn't mean she cannot be choosy about who she sleeps with,

Because if she really wants to stop history from repeating itself…


	2. Rich

**A/N: **Thanks to Jess for reviewing part one.

x tromana

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><p><strong>Part Two - Rich<strong>

The music is shit. Then again, he never believed a party at Mini McGuinness' house would actually have some decent tunes to listen to. That would be like going to a football match and expecting them to play anything other than football. Getting his hopes and expectations up would have only lead to disappointment.

Besides, he's not here for the music. Nor the atmosphere. He isn't even here for the booze or drugs.

He's here for one reason and one reason only.

The company.

He watches as Grace weaves her way back to him. Accidentally, she bumps into somebody he doesn't recognise, sloshing a little of her wine over the rim of the glass. The guy turns to give her a mouthful and Rich watches carefully.

If that bastard dares to lay one finger on his girl, then they'd have another thing coming.

However, the anger is soon dissipated. Rich knows he should've expected that. One smile from Grace could melt even the coldest hearted of people. She simply has that effect on people. Always has done and he suspects, always will.

Despite the room being packed with people they barely know, as well as a handful of a few close friends, it doesn't take Grace long to manoeuvre her way through the crowd and back to him. She doesn't even stop to chat to Liv, seemingly she only has one person on her mind.

Him.

That makes him feel like the luckiest man alive. Of all the men at Roundview College she could have chosen to date, it was him she had picked. The hottest fucking girl in the school ending up with the edgy outsider who doesn't want to fit in.

It's the kind of thing that doesn't usually happen in real life, so he cannot help but count his blessings.

She doesn't need to say anything for Rich to know that she's happy and therefore, he is too. Then again, he's always happier when he's around her. There's something about her gentle spirit that just lifts him.

It always does.

Rich hadn't noticed it at first. Or rather, he had chosen to ignore it. She wasn't his type, he'd insisted. Not like the Angel of Death, as Alo had dubbed her.

Once upon a time, he'd been so stuck in his ways. Believed that he shouldn't make sacrifices. That he should purely strive for perfection and if people didn't match up to his very high standards, then they wouldn't be worth it.

Back then, he'd barely regarded Grace as a friend, never mind the potential of being anything else.

How naïve he had been.

That doesn't mean he's willing to make sacrifices in all aspects of his life though. He still believes the government is doing a shit job and that choosing between the three main parties is like choosing between being stabbed, shot or poisoned to death. Nobody is about to persuade him that J.K. Rowling or Stephenie fucking Meyer are actually talented authors he should spend his time and money on. He cannot fucking abide Simon Cowell, the twat, and thinks the man deserves to die a slow and painful death for what he's done to the music industry. The same applies to everybody involved in the making of Glee.

Still he's the happiest he's ever been and right now, nobody can take that away from him.

Grace sits beside him and he allows a lazy hand to run up and down her back. When she rests her head on his shoulder, he cannot help but feel contented.

He's not sure what he's done to deserve this. Everybody else he meets thinks he's either some prepubescent try-hard or a self-opinionated tosser who should learn how to fit into society.

Grace, however, is different. She's accepted him, warts and all, and doesn't care that her friends think she's too good for him. Secretly, he agrees with them, but that doesn't mean he wants to admit it. He wants to savour every moment he gets to spend with her. They're inevitably going to go to different universities and sooner or later, end up drifting apart.

But there's no point regretting the future before it has even happened. The best thing to do is to take each day as it comes. Enjoy what he has before it's snatched away from him.

Eventually, he leans in and brushes his lip against her temple. Almost automatically, she tilts her head upwards and meets his mouth with her own. She swipes her tongue across his lower lip and then she immediately pulls away. There's a devilish expression in her eyes; one that is almost a contradiction to her personality. It's teasing and Rich loves and hates it in equal measures.

Instead, he distracts her with another crushing kiss. This is far better than talking. Far, _far_ better than doing anything else right at this very moment.

She smiles into his kiss and he can't help but reciprocate. The alcohol sits beside the sofa, forgotten. Instead, he chooses to deepen the kiss, not caring who is around him and what they think about public displays of affection.

He loves this young woman and he doesn't care who sees it.

Only a few months ago, he would have loathed this sort of activity. He'd believed it was the kind of thing that should have been left firmly behind closed doors. That there was nothing worse than seeing two people trying to suck each other's faces off. Sure, be in love and be happy and all that shit, but there's no need to rub everyone else's noses in it.

But then again, before now, he's never been in love.

Never understood the urge to feel, to touch, to explore, to experience.

The _need_ to be with that one person and one person only.

Sometimes, it feels like he needs Grace more than he needs oxygen itself. It's not something he quite understands, but right now it doesn't matter. They're together and that's the main thing.

Not that he'd admit to it, but he sometimes likes to daydream about them actually making it. Lasting the distance. Managing to get through university without being pulled in opposite directions. They'd get married, have the most fucking awesome children ever and be happy for the rest of their lives.

Realistically, Rich knows that this is a fool's dream. It's her affect on him. She's the dreamer of the pair of them and he knows it. He's meant to be the jaded, cynical one. But as he feels this happy, this complete, he knows that he never wants it to end.

Mostly because he doesn't know what he'll do when it actually does.


	3. Liv

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay in updating. I've been distracted by other projects.

Thank you to: JustAnotherObserver, Miss Peg and Anigen for reviewing part two.

x tromana

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><p><strong>Part Three - Liv<strong>

She knows that she's watching. Can feel her eyes practically boring into her soul. It makes her squirm and feel a little, no, very uncomfortable.

Then again, Franky Fitzgerald has that kind of effect on people. It's something about the way she looks at you. Knowing eyes, that's what Liv's always thought about her. She just knows _too_ much.

And in some respects, that's true. Good grief, the girl's seen her naked. Not only that, she's seen her having sex, fucking Matty, and on more than one occasion. That's something that is meant to be intimate, private. Definitely not to be watched by prying, uninvited eyes.

Yet, Franky invites herself. And continues to do so.

It's a violation and she knows it. Yet somehow, Liv can't bring herself to stop Franky. The odd dry, sarcastic comment is the most she can muster. Each and every time the snide words drip off of her lips, Franky flinches in reaction and then pushes it to one side as if it means nothing. Liv knows that if she were to try harder, then Franky would stop watching. The girl is obviously scared of human contact; the only way she can experience it is by observing others. If Liv were to push her that little too far, then that would be it. She would have her privacy back. Be able to keep all intimate liaisons to herself once more.

But does she want that? Really? There's a dark thrill in the whole situation. About knowing that somebody else is there, peeking through the cracks. If it _really_ unsettled her, then Liv would drag Matty somewhere much more private to fuck. Instead, she practically encourages Franky to watch because it makes the whole thing seem a little more… dangerous.

Liv tries to dispel the thoughts from her minds. She spots Grace, tries to corner her. It's as good a distraction as any. However, it's soon clear that Grace is far more interested in her boyfriend. Her eyes are clearly fixated on Rich, at the expense of anyone and everything else. There's no denying that the girl has changed since getting together with Rich. Everything Liv has known since before Roundview has changed.

Mini seems to have forgiven her for sleeping with Nick, after all, she _did_ invite her to this party but then again, she can't entirely be sure. It might just be an act, like she wants to lure her in before hurting her yet again. She can't tell, not really, because Mini has this deep-running manipulative streak, despite being genuinely sweet on the outside.

Liv's not blessed with Franky's intuition for these things. If she were, then she would have been able to get inside Mini's head and work out what the fuck she's thinking.

Part of her wishes she can go back to the good old days. When sex, drugs and alcohol weren't all that seemed to fuel her. Back when her mum seemed like a responsible adult, her elder sister wasn't imprisoned and Maude was still a baby. It was all so much easier back then. She knew who her friends were, that they weren't about to stab her in the back at any given time and things were just fun. Instead, it's all complicated now. Men seem to make everything more difficult. Then, there's the prospect of university looming. They'll be spread across the country then and if they are definitely close friends, then how can they guarantee that they'll last the distance?

Even in the age of social networking, it's easy to fall out of the habit of e-mailing or texting somebody. People get lazy, get distracted by new mates, new men, new pubs and clubs. The old ones just get left by the wayside.

Liv shakes her head again. This is not the time to be thinking like this. It's a party, for fuck's sake. She's meant to be having fun, getting pissed, getting high. That's exactly what everyone else is doing, after all. Briefly, she glances over at the sofa where Grace had been headed. Her friend is already getting very comfortable with boyfriend, without a care in the world. Obviously, whatever cocktail of substances Little Miss Gracie is on has gone straight to her head. Normally, she and Rich left displays of affection behind closed doors. Unlike herself and Matty…

Then, she spots him, across the room. His trademark crooked smile creeps across his face as their eyes connect. Liv feels that familiar rush of adrenaline course through her veins. She shudders slightly as she weaves her way through the crowds.

It's more difficult than it sounds. Half-clad bodies of people she barely knows writhe around her. Where Mini knows all these people from, she hasn't a clue. And quite frankly, she doesn't care either. Besides, it's also entirely possible that Mini doesn't know everybody here. News about parties spreads like wildfire and everyone seems to like to gatecrash.

Eventually, she makes it, however. Briefly, she glances to one side. No Franky. Yet. Then again, she seems to be able to hide in the shadows, so that's nothing new.

Matty doesn't say anything to her. He just wraps his hand around her own and drags her outside, into the back garden. The cold air hits her like a rush and almost immediately, she regrets wearing so little. Then again, clothing designed for partying was never designed for the Great British weather. She'd have to move a long way if she wanted half her wardrobe to be deemed 'practical'.

He notices she's shivering and slips off his jacket. With rounded eyes, she notices the telltale packet in the inner pocket. A familiar white powder; she doesn't even need him to tell her it's MDMA. As he places the garment around her shoulders, he hands her the bag. Liv's slightly disgruntled when he disappears on her briefly, but she understands why. This kind of thing is far easier to swallow with something else. The taste is foul, even if the after-effects are so, so worth it.

Minutes later, he produces a drink. Wine, she thinks, but she can't quite be sure in the dim light. Swiftly, he opens the bag and almost automatically, she opens her mouth. Gently, he places the drugs on her tongue and she takes a quick swig of the booze. Then, she returns the compliment. It's the least she can do. After all, he's the one who's making this stupid fucking party interesting for her.

Like he always does.

For a short while, they sit in silence, smoking spliffs and staring at the night sky. It's good to be alone, in the peace and quiet. Good to stop worrying about whether or not she's constantly being watched. And it's especially good being beside Matty, who's more than happy to bend to her every whim and supply her with whatever she wants.

She smiles as the MDMA finally hits her system. This is going to be good.


	4. Nick

**A/N: **Sorry for the delay in updating. I've been distracted by other (read: Mentalist) projects of late.

Thank you to Miss Peg for reviewing part three

x tromana

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><p><strong>Part Four - Nick<strong>

He doesn't know who this girl is and quite frankly, he doesn't care either.

Why should he? It's not as if he's going to remember this in the morning anyway.

Nick is already off his head, vaguely enjoying the buzz from a mixture of alcohol and drugs. He isn't even sure what he's taken or why. Just that he's swallowed everything that has been offered to him and will continue to do so until he passes out for the night. After all, you only live once and you might as well make the most of it whilst you still can. If not, you'll end up with a life full of regrets and missed opportunities and that is more depressing than the alternative.

Some people would say his life has changed into a train wreck. Especially his father, but quite frankly, he doesn't care. What the fuck has that bastard done for him anyway? Just force fed him a load of shitty false promises. It was all do as I say, not as I do, crap like that. How can you take a role model seriously when they don't fucking bother to practice what they preach?

He allows his hands to slowly wander down the girl's torso and he fumbles slightly with the button of her jeans. She laughs slightly before helping him out. Though he doesn't know her name, Nick's glad that she's dragged him upstairs and into the loos. It's a hell of a lot more private than attempting to surreptitiously do it in public.

No, whilst his dad would probably call him a wreck, as far as Nick's concerned, his life is now a rollercoaster ride and all the more exciting for it. Yes, it has its ups and downs and that's half the point. Without one, you cannot really appreciate the other.

As he digs into his back pocket for a condom, Nick takes the opportunity to scrutinise his latest sexual conquest. She's pretty, or at least, pretty enough. Not as pretty as Mini, though it's fucking difficult to be as drop dead gorgeous as she is. However, considering just how willing and eager this petite brunette is, she comes with a lot less of the fucking psycho crazy that Mini does. Which is a relief, because if there weren't girls like this in the world, Nick would never be getting any.

Besides, he's had enough of difficult to last a lifetime.

And of false hopes and lies.

And of always trying to fucking please.

Sometimes, he thinks he misses the rugby, thinks he misses being the team captain and having the adulation of everyone at the school. Wonders what his life would be like if he had carried on with the straight and narrow. If he would have been able grow a pair and get on with it or if he'd have just landed himself in the nearest loony bin, straight jacket and all.

At least this way, he doesn't have any pressure, any expectations, anything he needs to fight for. He can just do whatever the hell he wants, when he wants and nobody gives a fucking toss. Not even his dad, the wanker, which is a blessed relief because nobody wants a piece of shit like him breathing down their necks. He'd just been too blind to see it at the time.

Thing is, life still isn't as simple as he craves it to be. There's still the added complications, the ones that creep up on him when he least expects it.

There's Matty. When he'd been kicked out the first time around, Nick had honestly believed that he would never see his brother again. And now, now he's back in his life and making everything all the more difficult. Whilst he's still falling apart, Matty is pulling himself back together again. And because he's older, a man of mystery and intrigue, people are all the more interested in him and don't give a toss about Nick, who's just young and immature in comparison. Everybody loves a success story and all that crap. And he's the complete opposite of one, which is just fucking depressing.

It is his own fault. He didn't _have_ to throw everything away. Not really. He just got scared and ran away.

At least he still has his mates though. Or he thinks he does. He's well aware that Mini only invited him to this party because Grace had told her she shouldn't leave him out. She's still fucking pissed about the fact he fucked her best mate and then 'stole' her virginity. Nick can't blame her for that, but then again, she had been lying to him all the time. She had said she wasn't a virgin, that it didn't matter. That she just wanted their first time to be 'special'. If she hadn't _lied_ to him all that time, like his father had done, then things could have, would have, been different.

Or at least, he would have ended things more amicably rather than allowing their lives to thrown into such disarray.

He pulls the top over the girls head and she squeaks slightly as he catches some of her hairs. The moment is soon forgotten and within seconds, he's aware of her lips making an assault on his neck. Automatically, his hands move to her breasts. They're a nice size, good, firm. Nick's always liked a good handful. Not too small, but not too much either.

It doesn't take long for things to escalate further. The condom is on and things are good to go. Except for his mind, it's still whirring away, thinking of all of the what could have things.

Nick tries to push them aside as he thrusts deep into her. Might as well make the most of the situation, he considers. After all, he doesn't want to be like everyone he's ever known to this girl. Full of secrets and lies and promises that'll never be kept. She moans and squeaks again. He's okay now, he should be able to do this, it's a success.

But he's still thinking. About how to fix his life, about how to get off this rollercoaster before it destroys him. Maybe this isn't such a good idea. The sex, drugs and rock and roll lifestyle, that is. Maybe now is the time to pull himself back together again, before it's too late.

After all, if a fucking waste of space like his elder brother can do it, then why the hell can't he?

Or maybe, he should just think about this when he's sober, off the drugs and not having a quickie in a bathroom.

There _is_ a time and a place for such things, after all.


End file.
